As Maya Angelou once said:
“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
Queen Victoria reigned over Great Britain and Ireland from 1837 until she died in 1901. I heard a story about her recently that made me stop and think.
As the story goes, Queen Victoria was hosting a guest from a foreign country. At the end of the meal, finger bowls of water were passed around so that everyone could clean their hands. The guest of honor had never seen such a thing so he lifted it to his mouth and drank it. Stunned silence passed through the room until the Queen raised her finger bowl to her mouth and drank. And then all the guests followed suit.
Whether it’s an urban legend or a fact, it is such a great example of acceptance and making people feel that they are perfect just the way they are.
There will always be people who would shout from the rooftops at that moment, “What are you doing? That’s not for you to drink!” But those people are sad inside and live their life climbing higher on those they push down. May we all strive to be people who drink from the finger bowl and show the person who “made the mistake” that they are one of us. As taught by The Etiquette Institute, etiquette is for everyone.
About Us
Jan V. Stewart specializes in working with a range of clients including individuals in high-profile positions whose clients include dignitaries, heads of state, military personnel, and other VIPs. She also specializes in group and individual dining etiquette tutorials tailored to college students and recent graduates, young professionals, and C-suite executives.
With over two decades as a senior operations and administrative executive, Stewart’s experience is marked by top-level support for high-profile individuals and organizations. Her career spans the United States Senate, the Department of State, Corporate Television News and the private sector.
Clients of Stewart have gained life-long skills from her mastery of etiquette and interpersonal finesse stemming from her experiences in international diplomacy encompassing eight years at the U.S. Embassy in Tokyo, Japan, as well as working for former Secretary of State, Madeleine K. Albright. Her deep understanding of diplomatic protocol and refined social decorum are unmatched and make her a trusted liaison and representative in various formal and informal settings.
In her most recent role as Chief of Staff for the Leonsis Family Office, Stewart’s career expanded to managing several large family estates. Her proactive approach, attention to detail, and strong relationship-building skills made her one of the top in her field and in the space of global etiquette. Her experience exemplifies the highest standards of professional conduct.
Stewart resides in Arlington, VA, with her husband, a retired Army Colonel. She enjoys getting to know her clients and seeing the creative ways they can expand their professional pursuits with etiquette training. Stewart earned her Etiquette Consulting Certificate through The Etiquette Institute.